Closest to Heaven
by Aviva Aria
Summary: Clare Edwards isn't Daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, every man knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. He follows her home one night and just by looking into the matching blue eyes of her child he is smitten, head over heals, all over again. ECLARE future fic.
1. Chapter 1

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, every man knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

A/N: This is my newest creation, tell me what you think and if I should continue it, I really like the idea, but I don't know how you guys will react, so, please READ and REVIEW. :)

Liz

Closest to Heaven

Chapter 1

The saddest moment of Clare Edwards life, up to this point, really isn't considered all that upsetting. Of course the end of a two year relationship is unfortunate, but both parties were moving on, growing up, their lives were going in different directions, and it was time for them to go their separate ways. As much as Clare loved Eli, she knew that trying to continue a relationship, after he began his studies at Banting, would be pointless. After all, long distance relationships normally failed, especially between those who were still suffering through their education.

The day that Eli packed his boxes into the back seat of Morty, Clare was there, her eyes red, her nose blotchy and her lips swollen. When he came over to give her a final goodbye hug she clutched at him, gripping his worn Dead Hand shirt tightly in her fists as her tears seeped into the fabric at his chest. He pulled away leaving one last kiss on her lips before climbing into his antique hearse and driving off towards his future.

Eli left, and despite promises to visit and write, he never looked back. The school year began and soon Clare and Adam grew apart, not really having anyone to bring them together any longer. Eli came home during breaks and still didn't contact Clare, believing that seeing her would hurt him too much.

Eli spent his time with Adam during Winter Break, and his new girlfriend Noah, who lived not too far away. Clare spent all of her time with Alli, hanging out at the Dot or going to the Ravine. Clare took dance in her new spare time and started exercising her free will by going to parties. Two months into the second semester of her final year at Degrassi Clare found herself at yet another party and her life changed forever.

Four Years Later

Clare's Point of View

The music was pounding in the small club, and despite having done this almost every night for the last three years, I was incredibly nervous. There was a bachelor party here tonight, four guys, probably mid twenties, all watching the women around them with eyes dark with lust. I took a moment to look at them, their faces were filled with wonder, except for one, who smirked cockily at the stage. I squinted to get a more focused look. Eli.

I wanted to run, turn around and hide behind the bar, anything to get away from my first love. This is what terrified me the most about working in Toronto, I had avoided Eli since my graduation from Degrassi and now here he is at my work. If there was a God, Elijah Goldsworthy wouldn't be here right now, not that I believe in God anymore. Once Jesus has fucked you so hard in the ass already, you expect God has decided to double team you with him every time shit gets thrown at you.

Jillian our bartender pulled me out of my nervous breakdown as she handed me a tray full of drinks and pushed me in the direction of a table. As I served the tray of drinks to the table beside the party, where a bunch of business men around my fathers age sat around in suits, I hid my face, hoping that Eli wouldn't recognize me. One of them with salt and pepper hair groped at my ass as I walked by. A typical night for a place like this.

Gerald, my boss signaled me towards the back, revealing that it was almost my turn to dance. I went back stage where Coleen, another dancer, was just getting back into uniform, a short black ruffled skirt and a cropped pink halter top. Sweat dripping down her back. Dollar bills and a spandex outfit clutched in her hands. "Hey sweetie, go towards the old men tonight, the young ones are stodgy." She pulled her long red hair up into a ponytail as she touched up her make up.

As an older dancer she may have had more experience, but I had more sex appeal. She had two girls 15 and 8 who thought that mommy was waiting tables at the corner diner instead of stripping for nasty fuckers. For her sake I hope they think that forever. It's embarrassing to think that the people you love will see you like this, body undulating, crawling on your knees for one dollar bills, hoping that someone would ask you for a lap dance later. I changed into my costume, a uniform much like the one I wore in catholic school, obviously much sluttier, but basically the same. I reapplied some lipstick and met Gerald in the wings presenting myself to him. He nodded to James who worked the sound and lighting for our performances and the first strains of a song I knew better than my own name filled the room.

When I dance I don't feel. I just do, my body moves the clothes peel off and I just go, swaying and grinding, touching and moaning, I do my job. I don't normally look at the people I dance for. I don't want to know them, I show them my body, they give me my money and life goes on. They all start to look the same, the men, I mean. One after another, night after night its dance, a small part of your soul dies every time, and that's when you end up naked, standing on stage desperate and lost.

My body moved and swayed, my eyes avoiding theirs, they don't want me for my intelligence or my personality. They just want to get off, looking at me. I sway my hips as I pop open the buttons on my shirt, and use it as a lasso, swinging it above my head before throwing it to the ground. I play with the ties at my school skirt and wink at the guy who grabbed my bottom, taking his money when he offers it to me. My skirt fell in a pool around my ankles and I crawled towards the next man nipping at his fingers as I took the money in my teeth, giving them the show they paid for.

Slowly I stripped to the beat, grinding against air, answering their pleas for more with each inch of skin shown. The reveal of my body inspiring passion. With each piece of clothing taken off, another thought of an unbridled need was inspired. I danced until I was nude, and then, when the music stopped, I grabbed my money, took my clothes, and with one last look at my "audience," went off stage, making brief eye contact with Eli. There is nothing fabulous about the life of a stripper. I got off stage, and immediately wanted to leave, but my shift was almost over, and despite the obvious recognition in Eli's eyes, I needed the money.

I took my time getting dressed, reapplying my make up and counting out my bills before checking my cell phone. Alli had called me, telling me to be home as soon as possible, saying it was urgent, and I worried even more. I tried to get out of the thirty other minutes of my shift but Gerald insisted I finish up my night. Without the word emergency I couldn't do anything.

When I came back to the floor, Jillian told me I had a request for a lap dance and handed me a shot of Vodka. I shot it back, grimacing a bit as it went down, took a deep breath and walked, gracefully I might add, to the back room.

Eli lazily leaned against the bench in the back. His eyes slid over my body taking in every new curve.

"You look good" His voice was thick, as it normally was when he was turned on.

"You would know, you did just see me naked" I tried to bite my words but they came rushing out in my nervousness.

"I did, Clare I-" I cut him off.

"Im just doing my job Eli, you don't know me, and I don't know you. Let me give you what you paid for."

I led him into a private room sat him in the nice cushy chair and got down to business, that is, after all, what he came here for.

"No" he pulled me into his lap and crushed his lips to mine.

I was screwed.

Eli's Point of View

I saw her the second we entered the place. Exit 69 was the strip club in Toronto, not that I had ever been, I was a good boyfriend, and preferred Noah to strip for me than anyone else, but as the best man, it was my job to do as the groom asked.

Her hair was that same reddish brownish blonde that it had been in high school, a little bit longer, but just as curly. I wanted to comb my fingers through her hair, wrapping a springy curl around one digit. The uniform she was wearing showed off a larger bust than I remembered and her ass was fuller, more grab-able than it had been. All I wanted was to take a bite out of it. She seemed to avoid our table before she disappeared, I assume to perform. The woman on the stage had huge fake breasts that did nothing for me, all I wanted was to see Clare Edwards again.

When Clare came on, following the "sexy librarian" I wanted to cry out to the gods, there she was in a catholic school girls uniform, her eyes wide and lips parted. God, how I've missed her.

She started to dance and I wanted to pull her from that stage and take her on the table. I watched in awe, Caleb, Aaron and Joey were enjoying her, but with every move of her body, I was in heaven.

By the time Clare was in these cute pink panties and a matching bra, I wanted to kill every man in the room looking at her. As her bra was flung to the floor and her breasts were set free, her tiny nipples coming to peaks in the cold air, I knew I had to get her alone.

I watched the rest of her performance meeting her eyes at the end, ensuring she knew that I was here, and recognized her before excusing myself from the guys and heading towards the bar and requesting a lap dance from the delectable Clare. The bartender sent me to the back room telling me to wait there and that she would send Clare to me when she was back. All I could think about was Clare, the dead look in her eye was disturbing, but all I wanted was to kiss and hug her, and make the world better.

When she came into the room I almost didn't even speak, all I wanted to do was touch her again.

"You look good" I sound like such a tool. Obviously she looks good, she's a fucking stripper.

"You would know, you did just see me naked" Fuck, I annoyed her, her petit hands were clutched into balls.

"I did, Clare I-" she cut me off fast.

"I'm just doing my job Eli, you don't know me, and I don't know you. Let me give you what you paid for."

She led me to a small room, pushed me onto the chair there and I couldn't take it anymore.

"No" I kissed her, pulling her into my lap and closer to my reach, making sure she could feel how hard I was as she squirmed against my arousal.

"Eli" she moaned into my mouth. We still have chemistry, now to get her out of those panties again.

"Eli, no, I-I can't do this." She pushed herself off of me. "Look, you don't need to pay for whatever this is, I just, I can't ok?"

She ran out of the room, letting the door slam shut, it took me a moment before I went after her, and when I did, she was gone.

I grabbed my things and waited at the back door of the club, blending in with the shadows in my leather jacket. When she slid past me five minutes later in jeans and a hoodie, I followed her. She turned and walked past the club, walking a few blocks down and stopped at a grocery store, picking up some things before walking to the end of the street and turning down the next one. Two more blocks later in a neighborhood that made me wish that I had a knife in my pocket, she headed up the stoop and into a building.

I followed her in a few seconds later, noting on the numbers above the door where the elevator had stopped—3—before following up on the stairs. I took them by twos and reached her floor in no time, hiding behind the door looking through the glass window to where she opened the door to apartment 303.

Thats when I stepped out.

"Clare"

Clare's Point of View

I made it home in one piece with a bottle of milk and a carton of cookie dough ice cream, I opened the door to see Alli on the couch.

She whispered to the body there beside her wrapped in a blanket.

"Clare" I turned to see Eli behind me, before I could shut the door on him Cole came running at me, tears pouring down is pink chubby cheeks.

"Mommy."


	2. Chapter 2

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, every man knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind. AU. OOC Clare.

A/N: And here we are again. From all of those wonderful reviews, I know that I should continue this story, so here is the next installment. Sorry for any misspelled words and grammatical errors, I'm supplying fiction, but I don't have a whole team to work with, it's just me, myself and I.

I do not own Degrassi.

I hope you enjoy this story I'm hoping that it will be about 10-15 chapters, maybe a little longer. I'm glad I got the next part up so fast, it really makes me happy that this story is flowing so quickly out of my mind and onto the paper.

Reviews are appreciated, as always, if you have any ideas that you want to offer I may enter them into the story.

Closest to Heaven

Chapter 2

Clare's Point of View

As a mother, it's difficult to leave my child. Every night when I leave for work I think about everything. What If's are the inner monologue every mother must put up with.

What if he has a nightmare?

What if I'm late coming home?

What if he gets a booboo?

What if someone breaks in?

What if his dad doesn't pick him up from Pre-school?

I never thought "What if Eli finds out?" would be the one I dreaded the most.

Eli watched as I bent down to pick up Cole. I knew he was confused, hell, I was confused, what happened to the girl I was? When did I become a mom?

"Mommy," Cole nestled his head into my neck, his cheeks were hot against my skin. The tears slipping down my neck as he grabbed at my sweatshirt. "I huwt."

I turned around, my eyes meeting with Eli's, a forrest intertwining with a clear blue sky. I gestured towards the apartment, telling him with a nod that he could enter, and closed the door behind him. Alli stood up when she saw Eli, I could tell she couldn't decide to be appalled or annoyed so she just stood there, gaping at him.

"The thermometer, Alli, is in my nightstand, can you bring it to me?"

She shuffled off, not meeting Eli's eyes, but looking at me strangely. "I'll tell you later" I mouthed the words as she disappeared down the hallway.

"Cole, baby? This is Mommy's friend Eli, can you say hi?" I spoke gently against his hair, kissing the top of it gently as he tied to 'shyly' hide in my neck.

"Hi Ewi" The little boy peaked out quickly before rushing back into hiding again. "I huwt Mommy."

I wanted to cry inside, I felt awful, I shouldn't have left him and gone to work. I should have been here. I seem to miss everything because of my jobs.

Eli smiled tightly at me, looking to my left hand for a wedding band, or an engagement ring, something to make this situation seem real. I sat down on the couch after putting the bag of groceries on the kitchen able. Cole let me lie him down so I could grab him a sippy cup of apple juice. Alli soon came back into the room and put the thermometer under his tongue. And we waited. A minute later the device beeped signaling that it had correctly figured out Cole's temperature. 102.3. He was hot.

I wanted to cry. There was something so desperate about having to watch your child suffer. I handed him the sippy cup, and headed off towards the bathroom to run my baby a bath.

Alli and Eli were left alone with Cole, yet through the thin walls of the apartment I knew exactly what was happening.

"Dat's Ewi" He whispered to Alli, pointing at the man before them.

"I know baby, Mommy and I went to school with him before you were ruffled his blonde curls gently. Cole looked exactly like a little cherub, bright blue eyes, rosy pink cheeks and beautiful golden curls. He was my angel.

As soon as the water was filled halfway up I called to Alli to bring Cole in. Eli followed close behind, watching me with concerned eyes as I cared for my child. I pulled off Coles clothes and lifted him into the tub, washing him with his giraffe washcloth. He was shivering in the heat of the water, and I closed the bathroom door to keep the moisture in, hoping it would make things better.

"What hurts baby?" I was scared shitless.

"My tummy" Cole closed his eyes and started to cry again.

"Call Dr. Jones, Alli. Fast"

Oh Shit.

Eli's Point of View

A child. She was a stripper and she had a fucking child. What's next, were elephants going to pop out of the sky screaming that they could fly.

I must be dreaming, I swear there is something wrong about this. Clare Edwards would never have a child out of wedlock. I checked her ring finger, nothing, and with a quick glance around the living area, there were no pictures of her husband or boyfriend. Just ones of her and the little one, with Alli and her sister dispersed between photos.

This had been the strangest night. Clare was a stripper and she had a kid. I must be dreaming. I pinched myself, it hurt. Nope, not dreaming.

I watched her with the child, he was a cute little thing, he looked exactly like her, she was a mom, and a really good one. For some reason I felt angry that I had gone off to Banting. If I had stayed in Toronto, and gone to TU, I would be able to have been there when her life fell apart.

I ached to take care of her, despite knowing that Noah was at home waiting for me-Noah. I needed to call her, and fast, before she suspected I was doing something I shouldn't be, which I was, in a way, but that wasn't the point.

I watched Clare pick up her child and take him, Cole, into the bathroom, she undressed him and sat him into the tub of hot water, trying to get rid of his shakes. She looked like she was going to get sick.

Alli left to call the Doctor, and Cole cried.

This was the most nerve wrecking experience I had been in in awhile, thank God I didn't want to be a doctor.

I watched her bathe her baby for a moment, imagining that my mom used to do this for me, dressed in ripped denim and eyes rimmed with eyeliner, my Dad singing Iggy Pop in his office, her yelling at him to shut up because it was making me cry harder. Clare, in this moment was exactly like my mother, broken and trying to hold the shards of her life together with wounded fingers.

I excused myself for a moment, getting a hold of Noah to tell her that I was home, and asked her politely not to come over tonight, explaining that Aaron had passed out in my bed and I was sleeping on the couch. She offered up her place for a quickie before bed, but I claimed a headache and bowed out.

I never would have said this before Clare walked back into my life, but there is somethings more important than some expendable girl, and thats the woman you wished you hadn't given up.

Clare's Point of View

Eli left the room and I got Cole to settle down a bit, he wasn't crying anymore, but he was tired. His eyes were drooping shut, and so I lifted him up, wrapped him in his giraffe towel and carried him out of the bathroom to his nursery. As I sat him on his big boy bed, a race car with bars on the side, I realized that Eli was still gone. I dressed Cole in warm flannel pajamas, and tucked him in singing him the good night song before turning out the lights, turning on his night light, and leaving the room, closing the door behind me.

I followed the tenner of Eli's voice into the living room and plopped on the couch, watching him hang up on the person he was on the phone with. Alli left a note, explaining that Owen had called, and that she had talked to the doctor who asked me to make an appointment for Cole in the morning, and that she would be here to babysit the net day at six.

As much as I wanted to sit here and do nothing, maybe just cuddle up with a good book and go to bed, I had to talk to Eli, again. And somehow, he knew it was coming, and when he sat down beside me he looked at me expectantly, waiting for something to happen.

And it did.

He took one look at me, my makeup smudged, my hair a mess and when he smiled I did the only thing that was left for me to do in a situation like this.

I broke down and cried.

**Next Chapter: Who is Cole's dad? How did this happen to Clare? How could Eli hide the fact he was so in love with her? Why did he let her go in the first place? Expect some Flashbacks.**


	3. Chapter 3

Clare Edwards isn't Daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, everyman knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

A/N: I'm going to Ohio on Wednesday to visit my best friend, and Maid of Honor, Molly, so I'm trying to write as much as possible until then, hopefully I'll have two or three more chapters completed by then. I'm spending the weekend in DC visiting my cousin, so maybe it will inspire me in some way. As I promised in the last chapter, there will be flashbacks in this installment, and you guys will find out who Cole's "daddy" one person guessed in their reviews, and had it correct, the next chapter will be dedicated to her, as well as two of my Tweeps, Shehadastory and HeatherPoulette, who are the only ones who already know who had hot sex with Clare.

This chapter is dedicated to five wonderful writers:

For the WAZAM, because her ability to take these wonderful characters and place them into a different story inspired me to write this, so thank you 3. If you haven't read Rockstar, get out from under your shell and read it, and then start Proximity. I am so excited to be beta reading her work, it makes me smile.

To musiksnob, who always writes what I believe to be, the most real situations on .

For Literarylolita, who had me the moment we started talking Spring Awakening (gah), who always writes incredibly sexy stories, yum. F

loorplanhobo, Vices and Virtues, "OMFG I loves them." She really has the IC Clare and Eli down.

And finally, the lovely Zephyr Hearts, who takes on so much in each story she writes and takes my breath away with each chapter.

Ladies, thank you for the inspiration.

As is expected, I do not own Degrassi, but I own a beautiful engagement ring, and a wonderful man...well I don't exactly own him, but, you understand.

So, on with the story.

* * *

**Previously:**

_**As much as I wanted to sit here and do nothing, maybe just cuddle up with a good book and go to bed, I had to talk to Eli, again. And somehow, he knew it was coming, and when he sat down beside me he looked at me expectantly, waiting for something to happen.**_

_**And it did.**_

_**He took one look at me, my makeup smudged, my hair a mess and when he smiled I did the only thing that was left for me to do in a situation like this.**_

_**I broke down and cried.**_

**

* * *

**

Clare's Point of View

I sobbed, tears plundered down my cheeks, hiccoughing, heaving breaths left my lungs and the most unladylike sounds came from my body.

Cole was sick, and I had no idea how to fix him, and in some way, it had to be entirely my fault, just like everything else has been. It was my fault I got pregnant with Cole in the first place. And then my parents kicked me out and I didn't have a job, or a place to stay, or any money to live off of, that was my fault. I had such a bright future, Harvard, pre-law, and I ruined that.

I shook my head to get rid of the nasty thoughts piling up. Cole might have been unplanned, but he was perfect, and nothing could change that, even if my plans had to change, so be it.

I wiped my nose on my sweatshirt sleeve, and looked at Eli, wondering to myself why he had followed me home.

"I'm sorry you had to see me like that." I was tired, and emotional, considering I was on my period, I really had a low tolerance for everything at the moment, and that included unwanted blasts from the past. I looked away from him, wiping my eyes, hoping I wasn't too blotchy.

"Hey," he said softly, reaching over and lifting my chin so I would look at him. "Everyone needs a good cry every now and then, yours just arrived at an inopportune moment."

"Like everything else in my life." I gave him a weak smile and pushed myself up off the couch and into the small kitchenette, taking the plastic bag with the milk and ice cream with me.

The milk immediately went into the fridge next to a sippy cup of apple juice and some left over mac and cheese, I grabbed two spoons and the ice cream and ended up back on the couch.

"I hope you like Cookie Dough," I handed him the spoon and dug in.

Eli watched me for a moment, as I spooned a large mouthful of ice cream past my lips, he looked like he was contemplating asking me an important question.

"Clare, do you ever wonder what would have happened if we hadn't broken up?"

The question surprised me. Did I think about it? Yes, all the time. Those magical two words were what made up my existence, "what if." I looked at him wide eyed. How do you tell the only person you ever truly loved that they ruined it all for you?

You don't.

"You should have some ice cream, it's melting." He must have taken that as a no, and a second later he looked into his lap, trying to hide the pained look in his eyes. I felt awful, but sometimes lying, or in this case, omitting the truth is the best way to go.

He cleared his throat.

"So, now that were here, will you tell me what exactly happened, that is," he looked around the room, not meeting my eyes. "how did you end up like, well, like this."

I never though I would ever see Eli commit such a stunning display of verbal acuity, I rolled my eyes at the inside joke I shared with the man in front, if I said it, I would just be re-feeding him a line from high school. I kept my thought to myself.

"I mean, well, to be blunt-"

"You want to know who, what, when, where, why and how?" I laughed bitterly. "I thought you were an author, not a journalist."

His eyes widened and I realized that I let slip one of my biggest secrets.

"You know about my work." It wasn't a question.

I fucked up, again.

"You want to know what happened to me?" He gave a kurt nod.

"Do you have time?" He smiled goofily at me.

"For you, I have forever." As soon as the words fell from his lips my heart leapt, the fire in my belly, that had always existed for Eli roared to life.

And I told my story.

_**Flashback**_

_It was about a month after Eli had left for college, Adam and I had stopped hanging out and I spent more time with Alli, who obsessed less about boys, and more about college. _

"_I want to go to TU, so that I can be with Johnny again, I miss seeing him every day." After she ran away, she had harbored a huge crush on her ex boyfriend, now a junior in college. She spoke nonstop about her short time there, talking about neuroscience, explaining how being on the math team would help her gain admittance, considering the drama in her school file._

_We were heading out of the school and towards the bus when Johnny pulled up in his car._

"_Hey, do you girls need a ride?" He smiled boyishly at Alli, who looked at me with puppy dog eyes, with a sigh I nodded and we got into the car._

_After she kissed him on the cheek, Alli asked the obvious question._

"_What are you doing here? Don't you have class?"_

_Johnny smiled as he pulled away from the school, following the road away from Alli's house. _

"_I have to pick someone up." I could tell that Alli wanted to know more, obviously hoping it wasnt another girl. Before she could actually say anything though, we pulled up in front of an apartment building, in a not so great part of town. Johnny got out his cell phone, and texted someone quickly. _

"_I hope it's ok Clare if Owen sits back there with you." I smiled and replied that it was no problem. And placed my backpack at the floor by my feat. Moments later a tall guy with cinnamon brown hair and freckles came out of the building. He was dressed in a suit that was a bit too big for him, and was talking to a woman with a black eye and a split lip. She kissed him on the forehead, handed him a manila envelope and pushed him towards the car,_

"_Sorry it took so long man, my mom was having some trouble with step-dad." My eyes widened, Owen Milligan got into the back seat beside me and continued to apologize for the delay, not exactly realizing who was in the car with him. _

"_It's ok Owen, no problem man, you don't have your interview for another two hours, and I really don't want to get back to the dorm yet, James brought his girlfriend home last night and sexiled me, I had to go to class in the same clothes I was wearing the day before. He still hadn't let me back in by the time I had left to come get you. I was thinking we could grab some food at the Dot." _

_Alli confirmed that she and I would be interested in dinner, and that is when he noticed me. His blue eyes were different, not necessarily clearer or anything, they just held different possibilities than they had before. _

"_Clare Edwards, my, haven't you grown up."_

_A shiver ran down my spine as he looked at me. That night, I made plans to see Owen again, this time, alone for our first date._

_**End Flashback**_

"You left and the first person to realize that I was more than just "that Christian girl" was Owen"

"You went out with Owen? After everything he had done to Adam?"

"I forgave him." I took a deep breath. "He helped me get over you."

_**Flashback **_

"_You look beautiful." I met Owen at the Ravine after school, it was a friday night, so I didn't have too much planned, and it was my Dad's week with me. He wasn't all that involved in my life any longer. After the divorce my parent's had changed, Mom drifted towards sex, not trying to hide or explain why she was breaking her own rules, and Dad drank more. They blamed all of their problems on each other and I basically learned that they didn't exactly care any more._

_That night, about two months after I had gone on my first date with Mark, we went to a party at Bianca's house, she was home for some break or another and I got drunk for the first time, That was a night for a few firsts actually._

_**End Flashback**_

"You slept with him?" My eyes met Eli's "Is he Cole's Dad?"

"Just listen."

_**Flashback **_

_March of that year Owen and I were celebrating our fifth month anniversary. The next night we went to another party, this time at Ron Ron's place, his parents were gone, and Bianca had some E with her, and so we decided it couldn't hurt to try a little. It was stupid of me, I really shouldn't have done it. I had gotten into Harvard's pre-law program, and had a full scholarship, if I had been arrested, it would have all been taken away. Drew was there, as was Fitz and some other people I recognized from Degrassi, but didn't really know, like Marisol, om the Spirit Squad, and Jess, she was in her third year. After we split the pill, I kissed Owen and whispered that I'd be back, and went off to find something to help me swallow the drug. I found some wine coolers in the kitchen._

_**End Flashback **_

"After that, I remember bits and pieces," my eyes were filled with tears. "But what I took, wasn't E."

I needed a second just to breath, and he rubbed my back gently, taking the carton of ice cream and the spoons and setting them on the coffee table.

"I came out of the fuzzy daze to find myself naked and Fitz pulling up his boxers. I was bleeding, and I wasn't on my period, and I knew that he raped me. I think I screamed after that. Nine months later Cole was born. My parents kicked me out, Owen and I broke up and I turned down Harvard. But even with all of that shit, I have the best baby boy I could wish for."

"But Owen called earlier?" Eli was pissed off, and confused at the same time, if it seems possible.

"He's still Cole's daddy, just not by blood." I gave him the answer I would give Cole one day, if he ever asked. "That, and he and Alli are dating now, and before you ask, no, it doesn't bother me."

Eli's Point of View

I was pissed. Clare told me everything, all of the pain and sorrow and all of the candy coated moments of her life after me, or at least the highlights, and all I could think of was what that Monster did to her. He pretended to be religious and then stabbed her with his stubby dick.

"What happened to Fitz?" I wondered out loud.

"I pressed charges, he's in jail at the moment, for all I know he could be out. I really try to avoid thinking about him"

I looked at the woman I still loved, now that she was back in my life, I had to find a way to break up with Noah, nicely, and claim Clare once again as my own.

I never should have broken up with her, but I needed to distance myself from her, as much as I wanted to spend every moment with her for the rest of my life, I could sense that something was going to happen, much like the situation I had with Julia. The fight Julia and I had before she died all happened in a jealous rage, I was afraid that if Clare and I remained together, in a long distance relationship, that I would lash out of her, and not trust her, believing that she was cheating on me at every moment I couldn't be in contact with her. I'd rather that she hate me for breaking her heart, than to hate me for scaring her away.

She looked so tired and small sitting beside me on the couch.

"Would you mind if I stayed here tonight?" She looked at me shocked and then nodded her head.

"I'll make up the couch for you, it's a pull out. She went down the hall, and brought back some sheets, a pillow, a towel, and a comforter.

"Owen sometime's sleeps over when he babysits Cole," she explained why she was so prepared for visitors. "I kind of expected him to be hear tonight, instead of Alli, but he had to work as well."

I helped her move the coffee table and open the couch, before heading into the kitchen as she made up a bed for me. I put away the ice cream, rinsed the spoons and put them in the dish washer.

When I came back to her she was placing the towel onto the kitchen table.

"To be honest, I'm glad you are here, I really need some one to be here tonight, after what happened to Cole today, I guess I feel better knowing that if he woke up again I would have someone beside me to make sure he was ok. That's the hardest part, I guess, of being alone."

**

* * *

A/N** What do you think is wrong with Cole? How does Eli break up with Noah? Should he be worried that Clare won't want to be with him?

Was it like you expected? Review and tell me what you think, is there anything you would add or take out?

Please Read and **REVIEW**.


	4. Chapter 4

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, everyman knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

A/N: Two updates in one week, hoping for another tonight, but don't hold me to it.

Answering some questions:

LITTLEMISSGOLDSWORTHY: Fitz is Cole's biological father, meaning he provided the DNA, Owen plays the role of father because he is a good guy, and he realizes that Clare needs someone. After his relationship with Clare ended, he ended up dating Alli, in this story they are in a committed long term relationship, more than likely heading towards marriage.

You guys will get the chance to see all of your favorite Degrassi characters back in action. Tell me who you really want to see in your REVIEW, and I will try to bring them into the story.

This chapter is dedicated to my gal pals, Shehadastory and HeatherPoulette, Twitter would be boring without you both, and to Elijahgoldsworthy5243 for guessing correctly that Fitz was Cole's daddy.

I'm off to Ohio on Wednesday to visit my best friend, and Maid of Honor, Molly, so I'm trying to write as much as possible until then, hopefully I'll have two or three more chapters completed by then, if not, they will be done by Friday.

This chapter was typed while watching Degrassi, a television show that I do not own. I just manipulate the characters.

Eli's Point of View

"MOMMY." I woke up to screaming, in a dark room, on an uncomfortable couch, disoriented. "MOMMY. MOMMY. MOMMY."

I got off of the pullout and ambled out of the living room and down the hallway towards the sound. I opened the first door on the left to see Cole wailing, his hands clutching at his belly. I flipped the light switch on and picked him up.

His body was hot, and his stomach was protruding more than it had when he went to sleep. There were even dark bruises on his arms and legs.

"I want my MOMMY" he screamed louder and I carried him into Clare's room, knocking gently on the door and waited a few seconds before entering.

Clare was on her back, the covers pushed down around her waist. Her pajama top, a lacy tank top was riding up, and the sweet curve of her belly was revealed to my eyes.

"Clare?" She stirred, turning on her side to look at me through the darkness.

"Eli?" She sat up abruptly. "What are you doing here?"

Cole wailed a bit louder, needing his mother.

"Cole, baby, come to Mommy." She turned on the bedside lamp and I placed him into her outstretched arms.

"Mommy," He nuzzled into her body, shivering against her.

"What's wrong with him Eli?"

"He was calling for you." I sat down on the edge of the bed. "He was clutching his belly again. He's really warm."

Clare's Point of View

I rushed to get dressed, Cole was sitting on my bed, crying the entire time as I pulled on my trainers and a sweatshirt and called for a cab.

I was nervous. I had no insight into Fitz's medical history, and now that Cole was suffering from unknown body pains, and strange bruises were appearing on his little body, I was worried that something was seriously wrong.

Eli followed behind me as we took the stairs, Cole in his arms, a bag in mine. We made it down the stairs and into the cab, telling the driver to take us immediately to the hospital. There was traffic, which, considering the time was quite unexpected, but we made it to the hospital and started filling out Cole's paperwork.

I tried to send Eli back to his apartment, but he wouldn't leave. I called Alli and Owen, and then did the only thing left. I waited.

Cole cried softly in my arms until he tired himself out enough so that he fell asleep. I rested my head on Eli's shoulder and zoned for the time being, hoping that everything would be alright.

"Cole Edwards," a nurse called out. I jumped out of the chair I was in as Eli and I were led to a room. I sat on the hospital bed with Cole still wrapped around me. Expecting to wait at least another hour before we were seen.

Not twenty minutes later, a doctor came in, looking at Cole's chart. A worried line dominating his large forehead.

"This must be Cole," he smiled at me, flashing perfect, even, white teeth. "I'm Dr. Winklestein. The nurses said he was screaming his head off when you came in. He sure is a cutie when he's quiet though."

I smiled lightly through my nerves.

"Thank you."

"You must be very proud Mr. Edwards, a beautiful wife and a handsome son." He reached out a hand for Eli to shake.

Eli nodded, taking his hand in a firm grip, giving me a look that said 'Keep your mouth shut.'

"Now, lets see what the problem is, shall we?"

He looked at us expectantly.

"Please, what are his symptoms?" The doctor took out a pen and sat at the corner desk, ready to write.

"Well, he had an ear infection two weeks ago, and a cold a few weeks before that, and last night he was complaining about a tummy ache."

"He had a high fever." Eli added. "And he was sweating and shivering."

"Have you seen any bruising?" Dr. Winklestein looked a bit nervous.

"Yes, quite a few, dark ones too. And his belly is swollen, despite the fact that he's been losing weight in the last month."

The doctor nodded.

"I'll need to take a blood sample, and I'll be able to tell you exactly what is wrong with him later in the day, probably after lunch. But to be honest, he has an overwhelming amount of symptoms that point towards Leukemia. If it's something else, I would be shocked."

Eli nodded reluctantly.

"Thank you Doctor." I watched as a nurse came in and stuck Cole with a needle, causing him to stir for the first time since we started talking to the doctor. She drew his blood, gave him a Handy Manny bandaid and sent us on our way.

This wait would be the worse. Now that I know what he probably had it was even more terrifying as I hoped to god that this was just a coincidence, or a fluke. Nothing should be wrong with my baby. This type of thing happened in movies or books, not in real life, and definitely not to me.

Eli called us another cab, and soon we made our way back to my apartment, the sun just rising, shining light into the nooks and crannies of Toronto, chasing away some of the darkness. I wish it could do the same to my life.

A/N: Okay, that was a quick chapter, but it was necessary for it to be short, that seemed like the best place to stop for the moment, otherwise, it would be a very long chapter. The next part will be longer. Hopefully it will be done tonight.

Please Review!


	5. Chapter 5

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, everyman knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

A/N: Three updates in one week. So happy that I've reached 50 reviews! Here is a drama-filled thank you chapter. Sorry it took a little longer to update than I previously believed it would be. I am having a wonderful time in Ohio, I brought the warm weather yesterday, but today was much colder. I'm heading home tomorrow night, getting home in time to watch the second showing of Hide and Seek part 2 on TeenNick at 10:00 pm. Please follow me on Twitter, under Avivaaria, I love talking to my readers, and enjoy discussing Degrassi, as well as every aspect of life.

Questions:

**ClareandEliforever** asked: Why did Eli agree to being the dad and her husband?

Eli, at least to me, is a considerate guy. Despite his rough edges, he would do the right thing, and in a situation like this, where it is more ideal to have two parents, he realized that it would be more helpful if at first (at least) the doctors and nurses believed that Eli was Cole's dad. Where I live there are a lot of single parents, watching them struggle for support is quite depressing. My neighbor who has a six year old, she is 22 years old, recently was kvetching to me about some of the problems she faces as a single mother, and something that surprised me is the different ways we are treated. When she goes out to eat with her daughter, by herself, she is treated like a social pariah. Yet, the few times I have babysat for her with my Fiance and gone out to eat we get kind words and good service. There is no racial differences, we are a year apart in age, the only difference is the man in my life. I have a feeling that Clare has been treated badly as a single mother. Also, Eli wants her back, the fact that he was trying to be the man in Clare's life says something to her about the commitment he is willing to give to her makeshift family.

**RQRGJM9311** asked: Cancer? Really?

Yes, Cancer. My little brother was diagnosed when I was five and he was four. I don't remember much, but from what my parents tell me it is a situation that can bring even the most hated enemies together. If you continue to read, which I hope you do, you will find that the Cancer is necessary to the plot and the character growth.

**PolkaDotBowLace** asked: How could they be so calm?

Clare is strong. In this situation her strength might falter, but she must remain composed for two reasons. One, Cole is in her arms, children are very adept at understanding emotional changes, and he would react negatively if she started to cry. Two, She doesn't want to show weakness in front of Eli, he broke her once, she doesn't want him to see her cry. Also, the doctor never confirmed that it is Cancer, that is revealed after the blood test, so that they could count his white blood cells.

This chapter is dedicated to **catherine. cat ****33, **who was the first person to REVIEW the last chapter, as well as Hersch24 [Degrassi Society] for being so interested in my writing. Most importantly though, to my fiance, Cameron, I miss you, I love you. This is for you just like everything else I do.

The first three people to REVIEW this chapter will have the next chapter dedicated to them.

So, without further ado, I do not own Degrassi.

* * *

Clare's Point of View

I sent Eli home as soon as we returned to my apartment. I didn't want him around to see me cry, again. We traded numbers, he gave me a quick kiss on the cheek and then left. I place his number on the kitchen counter, expecting to loose it long before I ever used it. I sent Eli out of my life at one point, and now that he was back, I could do it again. I hurt more than I ever did before. Cole was sick. Really, really sick, and the best thing I could do at the moment was put him to bed and read as much as I could about Cancer and the death rate among young children.

I slipped into sweatpants and a t-shirt called in sick for work at the diner, Ed's Diner, which was right around the corner, was my second job, and sat down on the couch with the phone next to me and my laptop on my lap. I researched the way Ms. O and Mr. Simpson had taught us, all those years ago in Degrassi.

Most of the information I found was pretty much what I already knew. Cancer, Leukemia to be specific. There were different kinds, some were fatal, others now treatable, children have a higher survival rate.

I put my laptop on the coffee table and just sat there for a moment, thinking about my life and how much last night had changed what I considered to be normal.

Cancer. Cole, my baby might have cancer. I never thought something like this would happen. How could someone so little be so sick?

God had yet again decided to piss all over my happiness. Just as Eli had walked into my life Jesus Mother Fucking Christ decided I was too happy for my own good and turned everything to shit again.

I was tired and emotional and all I could think of was watching this disease tear my baby apart.

I sat there for a while, not noticing that tears were silently trickling down my cheeks. I tried to wipe the tracks away, but more tears fell. All of a sudden life was even more difficult. I hadn't even thought about hospital bills. It was tough enough to afford my own place, plus the food and toys necessary for housing a growing child. I couldn't turn to my parents, and Fitz didn't even know about Cole, Owen already contributed enough, as did Alli, with all the free babysitting they did. I needed to find a third job, or pull some extra shifts, something, anything, just so that I could make everything better for Cole.

I stood up and made my way down the hallway towards Cole's bedroom. I opened the door to his room, looking around at the walls, a mural was on the wall opposite the door, a road leading through the plaines of Africa with the different animals that inhabited the area covered the far wall. Lions and zebras, antelope and hippos and obviously giraffes watched as the dust, leading from Cole's race car bed filled the road. It was a scene of my son's two favorite things. The other walls were a grassy green color. Cole was tucked into the car, his hands fisting the comforter and his arm wrapped around Raffe, his giraffe.

Tears continued their course down my cheeks as I watched him breath quietly, dreaming as he slept. In the other room, my phone rang.

I ran to get it before the ringing stopped. It rang two more times before I had reached in.

"Hello, this is Clare Edwards speaking, how may I help you?" I breathed into the phone nervously, hoping it wasn't the doctor.

"Hello Mrs Edwards, this is Nurse Hopkins, I took Cole's blood earlier this morning, the results have just arrived back, and Dr. Winklestein would like to speak to you. Shall I put him on now, or is it a bad time?"

"Now is fine." I felt tense as she transferred me to the doctor.

"Mrs. Edwards?"

"It's Ms. Edwards, doctor."

"Yes, well, I have some upsetting news," he took a long pause. "Sadly, Cole's blood results show that he has Acute Myelogenous Leukemia, which affected the white blood cells called the Myelocytes. This is treatable, but we should make an appointment to start chemotherapy soon, just because this has come on so fast."

I nodded. "Yes, of course, Who do I set up this appointment with?"

"Nurse Hopkins can help you. I am really sorry Ms. Edwards, this must be a difficult time in your life."

I felt numb. Dead. I was broken. Cole was really sick. He needed Chemo. I needed money. Fast.

I made an appointment for a consultation with a doctor at the hospital, who would help me understand everything that was happening with Cole.

After hanging up the phone again, I put my head in my hands and sobbed my eyes out. Allowing all of my anger and frustration out in my sorrow. I cried for a good hour before falling into a fitful sleep.

I awoke again when it was dark. Cole was sitting on the floor beside the couch, playing with matchbox cars. The light in the kitchen was on, dinner was on the table, and a sticky note was on my forehead.

_Came by to babysit, let myself in, you were here, so I made dinner took care of Cole and stepped out for the evening. Call me later. Alli_

I sat up, stretching as I went. Cole stood up and toddled towards me.

"Mommy shleepy?"

"No baby, Mommy is awake. Were heading back to the hospital tomorrow."

"Hoshpal?" he tried to climb into my lap. I lifted him to ensure he didn't fall.

I carried him over to the table, sat him in his high chair and gave him some broccoli as I cut up pieces of chicken for him. I thought some more as I did this, thinking some more about my options, before deciding that perhaps it was time to pick up more shifts at the club. More time with my clothes off meant more money, after all.

* * *

Eli's Point of View

As soon as I left Clare's place I headed to Noah's, she and I needed to talk, and soon.

I sent Adam a quick text.

_Just saw Clare. FUCK. I have news for you._

I took a cab and made it to her place in no time, waving 'hello' to her doorman and taking the elevator up to the ninth floor. I took out my keys from my jacket pocket and turned the lock, twisting the doorknob open. Seconds later Noah came down the hall towards the entrance way from the living room.

"Eli, love, your here early." I didn't give her much time before I pulled out those dreaded words.

"We need to talk."

She looked at me confused.

"What happened hun?" Her word of endearment for me throwing me off.

"I saw Clare"

* * *

A/N: I know, a cliff hanger, but soon, tonight probably, you will find out how much Noah knows about Clare, and Julia. Plus, in the next chapter we shall hear back from Adam.

I have heard of a few people you guys want to see, but I'm sure there are more.

Spinner, Adam, KC (which would bring Jenna and their kid into the story as well), and Jimmy. If there is anyone else, please tell me in either a tweet [Avivaaria], a message, or through a **REVIEW**.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Sorry it has been awhile since I updated, I'm back in school, and Cameron was on a business trip until Friday. What did you guys think of the new episode? That kiss wasn't as steamy as I expected, but I was proud of Tinsley for once. This story does not take into account Chasing Pavements, I love Fadam too much.

This chapter is dedicated to themeaganmarie, clareandeliforever, and catherine . cat 33 for being the first three readers to review, thank you for making me feel so loved. To the rest of you, thank you I get a bit giddy every time I get an email telling me that one of you lovely people have reviewed my story. For those of you who do not review, please try to, I try to answer my reviewers in my author's notes, or in a direct message. I do look to see how many people have read my stories, and knowing that you guys read it makes me so happy.

Please read and REVIEW, I know I beg for them, but they make me write faster.

Where we left off:

_"Eli, love, your here early." I didn't give her much time before I pulled out those dreaded words._

_"We need to talk."_

_She looked at me confused._

_"What happened hun?" Her word of endearment for me throwing me off._

_"I saw Clare"_

Now, on to the story.

Chapter 6

Eli's Point of View

I led her into the living room as she thought over what I had said.

"Clare? You saw Clare?" She looked at me confusedly for a moment before recognition filled those clouded blue eyes. "Clare."

"I saw her at that club I went to with the guys." I wanted to explain it all. "Noah, I still love her."

"I know, Eli." She surprised me. "I've known since we met that you would never love me the way you loved her."

I watched her, shocked by her reaction. Noah knew of my feelings for Clare, it bothered me.

"It's not that" I never loved you, I do—I mean did love you."

"I know Eli." My head was spinning.

"How did you..." She sat down on the couch and pulled me beside her.

"You talk in your sleep."

Fuck, do I? I need to find out, at least before I stay over at Clare's again. God I hope I get to stay there, hopefully not on the couch next time.

"I-I'm sorry" I felt awful pulling this on her, especially considering we had gotten to that point where I had already asked her father for his blessing.

"Eli. I've known since our freshman year. You love her. Tell her before she doesn't accept you."

"She has a kid." I felt bad telling Noah. "She's a stripper, and I still love her."

"Then go to her Eli," She was forceful, for once. "besides, I kinda started seeing someone already."

"You what?" I was pissed, even though I really had no right to be upset. She cheated physically and I cheated emotionally. "With who?"

"Eli, it's not his fault," She was trying to protect someone. "Caleb was just trying to help me out."

"Caleb? You fucked my friend?" I had no right to be upset, and yet, I still was.

"One thing just led to another, you know how that is Eli."

"No, I don't know how that is, I may still be in love with Clare, but I have never cheated on you. Ever." I snarled at her, standing from my seat on the couch and turned away from her.

"I'm leaving. Don't contact me."

I stormed out of there, slamming the door behind me.

I'm not proud of it.

_What? Where did you see her?_

I checked all of my text messages. Adam sent me eight, each of them saying the same thing. Then there was one from a number I didn't recognize. I crossed my fingers, hoping it was Clare.

My phone went off in my hand.

_CALL ME_

Adam, again.

I pressed the number three on my phone, the speed dial for his home phone.

"_Hello, Torres residence, Fiona speaking."_

Adam and Fiona were just recently engaged, and she had just moved in with him.

"Hey Fi, can you put Adam on, he's been texting me nonstop for the past hour."

"_Do you need me to punish him?"_

I shuddered a bit in disgust.

"No, just put him on."

I could hear her call for him and tell him I was on the phone.

"_What happened? When did you see her? How is she?"_

I took a moment to process what was happening.

"She's incredible." I breathed into the phone.

"_Puke man, you guys still make me sick."_

"She is still the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I just want to do things to her."

"_Ugh, if I wanted to know this I would have asked. So what does she do?"_

"She's a, well, she's a stripper."

"_No way, Clare Edwards, innocent little Clare-Bear, a stripper? What happened to the purity ring?"_

"She has a kid." that stopped the conversation for a moment.

"_Is she married? 'cause, Man, if she is, it's just wrong, whatever you want to do to her is just stupid and wrong. Just don't ok, promise me you won't ruin her life."_

"She's a single mom, Adam, I'm not a horrible person."

"_Right, yeah, that's why she strips then?"_

"Yeah." I felt bad about telling Adam everything. "I still love her."

"_I know Eli"_

Was I really that obvious?

"How do you know?"

"_Your book."_ He knows me too well. _"The female lead, Ella, she may have had a different name, but anyone who knows Clare knows that Ella is just an exaggerated version of her. What with the purity pledge, and the dysfunctional family. Even her description is familiar to what Clare looked like at Degrassi, curvy, vivacious, colorful Clare."_

"There were plenty of people who influenced Ella, Fiona, for one."

"_You also dedicated the book to her." _I was shocked that he figured that out. _"'To my Silvia Plath, you are the star forever on the horizon just out of my reach. I dedicate to you my life's works, starting with this novel.' It was obvious."_

"Well glad to know." I freaked out a bit. "Noah and I broke up."

I had to tell him, and I was glad that I did.

"_She texted Fi as soon as you left. I know man. Sorry about Caleb."_

"You knew?" he was silent on the other line. "Do you want to come with me to see Clare again? I need to see her, and Cole, I need to get her back."

"_I'll come. Just text me where to meet you and I'll be there."_

"OK, good, I guess I'll see you later." I received a quick response from the other end, before I hung up.

I dialed the other number, hoping it was Clare.

"_Goldsworthy, if you hurt her, I kill you" Alli's_ normally cheerful cut into my hope like a thousand razors.

"I won't Alli. I just want her back in my life. I hate what happened to her and to Cole, I want to be there for her, to protect her. You and Milligan can't always fix things for her, your'e going to want your own family one day."

I knew I pushed against some of her most prevalent fears.

"Let me be there for them."

"_I'll text you her cell number." _

"Thanks Alli"

She hung up in a huff.

A second later she sent me a text with Clare's number, and her work schedule for the next week.

_See her again._

I saved both numbers in my contact lists. And once again headed home. Who knew that in just 48 hours life could change so drastically.

Clare's Point of View.

I still had to work tomorrow. I couldn't take off any more time. I may want to spend more time with my baby, but sometimes, money was more important, in a case such as this, the latter was true.

Cole and I have an appointment for tomorrow with the doctor, and there we will start figuring out information about treatments. At the moment, Cole was playing with his stuffed giraffe, chewing on an ear as though it were food.

"Are you hungry buddy?" He just ate, but I still had to check.

"Ewi?"

"Eli went home baby, it's just you and Mommy." He started crying. "You just met Eli sweetie, do you really miss him that much, what about Daddy?"

"EWI" he screamed at me, clenching his fists and kicking over the blocks on the carpet. He threw himself to the ground, ready to throw the biggest tantrum of the ages.

"EWI. EWI. EWI. EWI." He banged his fists against the floor tears streaming down his cheeks. "ME WANT EWI."

I didn't want him to hurt himself, so I intervened, lifting him into my arms and walking briskly to the kitchen, finding Eli's card and immediately placing a call on his home answering machine.

"Eli, this is Clare, I—Cole misses you, how do you feel about coming over and watching Toy Story tonight? Please get back to me as soon as possible. I have a crying toddler who wants nothing more than to see Eli right now. Call me back as soon as possible." I gave him my number and hung up. Cole still screaming into my ear.

I hope to god Eli calls me soon. I need all the help I can get right now, even if it is from Eli.

A/N: The first three reviewers will again get the next chapter dedicated to them. If you have any insight as to what will happen next, please make guesses, the person who is correct, or the closest, will receive the gift of 100 Eli kisses, and the ability to dictate the idea for my next one shot, either Harry Potter, Glee, or Degrassi. I can't wait to see what you guys come up with.

Liz

P.S. Please REVIEW, I'll love you forever.


	7. Chapter 7

Hey guys, sorry it took so long, but my semester is over, Cameron is home and I have officially started work, so we can get on with the show. I went through my outline and just want to tell you guys what you have signed up for, 35 chapters in total, this story is going to span at least a year, its emotional and terrifying and look forward to both physical and legal battles.

This chapter is dedicated to DegrassiEclare4life, Catherine. Cat 33 and Munroloverx for being the first three to comment, you all know you want a shout out from me, so, be the first three to review and you get my thanks and acknowledgment (I'm not Munro, but I do write a fun Eli.)

**I'm trying to come up with a middle name for Cole, so if anyone has any ideas, just put them in a review, I will be doing a vote of the top three names that I like, and the person whose suggestion gets chosen gets a shout out and the ability to prompt me my next one shot—must be Degrassi, Glee or Harry Potter.**

I did not create Degrassi. I wish I did, but sweet baby boy Edwards (Cole) belongs entirely to me, I really do own his stuffed giraffe though, Raffy, and Dori, my two stuffed giraffes from my childhood inspired a child with an obsession with the awkward long necked animals.

P.S. Dori and Raffy are happily married and planning on having their first child soon, which reminds me, I need to get her from the zoo.

Reminder:

_"You just met Eli sweetie, do you really miss him that much, what about Daddy?"  
"EWI" he screamed at me, clenching his fists and kicking over the blocks on the carpet. He threw himself to the ground, ready to throw the biggest tantrum of the ages.  
"EWI. EWI. EWI. EWI." He banged his fists against the floor tears streaming down his cheeks. "ME WANT EWI."  
I didn't want him to hurt himself, so I intervened, lifting him into my arms and walking briskly to the kitchen, finding Eli's card and immediately placing a call on his home answering machine.  
"Eli, this is Clare, I—Cole misses you, how do you feel about coming over and watching Toy Story tonight? Please get back to me as soon as possible. I have a crying toddler who wants nothing more than to see Eli right now. Call me back as soon as possible." I gave him my number and hung up. Cole still screaming into my ear.  
I hope to god Eli calls me soon. I need all the help I can get right now, even if it is from Eli._

Chapter 7

Clare's Point of View

"Clare, open the door!" I could hear Alli yelling in the hallway. I'm sure my neighbors hated me already, what with Cole screaming his head off, I didn't need my loud mouthed friend to add to their noise complaints.

I opened the door for her and ushered both Owen and her into the apartment, holding Cole close to me as he whimpered, tears still freshly rolling down his cheeks as he wished for Eli. I had no clue what that man had done, but somehow he had bewitched my son in a matter of twenty four hours.

Owen takes Cole from her as soon as he enters the apartment, the small child latches his arms around his 'daddy's' neck and holds on for dear life. As Owen retreats into Cole's bedroom Clare notices the shine coming from the ring finger on Alli's left hand. She was engaged.

"Alli! How...? When did he pop the Question?"I was excited for her, nervous obviously at the thought that my son would lose the only man he knew of as his father to biological children, but altogether happy for my best friend.

"He asked me last night. In a fortune cookie." She was glowing with happiness. "It was dorky, but the sweetest thing ever."

I smiled, waiting for her to tell me bad news. I could tell as soon as she walked in that she had showed up to tell me something bad, and now that I knew about their engagement I was almost positive it had to do with Owen and his fake paternity.

I could hear Cole in his room, laughing, probably while Owen tickled him. A part of me died at the thought of telling my child that his 'daddy' no loger wanted him. Wasn't it bad enough his real father didn't give a shit.

"FItz is out of jail." I wasn't expecting that.

"Wait, how do you know? Are you positive?"

I was pissed off. There was no way that Asshole was getting near me or my child, especially now that we had to deal with Cancer. I can't deal with Mark Fitzgerald coming back into my life and screwing everything up.

I had to call Eli.

I looked at Alli apologetically and rushed into the kitchen, I wanted to stick my head in the oven, but even though Plath was my nickname, I would never do what she did. I picked up the house phone and dialed the numbers on the card he had left behind, for the second time that day.

_Hey, this is Eli, leave your name, number and a brief message after the beep and I'll call you back. _

**BEEP**

"Hey Eli, it's Clare, again, I uh-I really need you. I didn't realize earlier how much I depend on you, but I would really appreciate it if you would come by, bring an overnight bag, or something. I just...I need you."

I hung up immediately. My hands were shaking. Silence came over the apartment and I wiped my hands down my thighs, the sweat leaving a dark imprint on my jeans.

"Clare?" Alli had followed me. I leaned against the refridgerator, scribbled drawings in multiple crayon colors hung on the white appliance, pictures of my son and our makeshift family surrounding his artwork; Maybe I should stick my head in the oven.

"What's wrong?" I let out a shuddered breath.

"Everything." I whispered against the cool surface, not even sure she heard me.

"That's absurd Clare." She laughed as though my problems were petty. "Not everything in your life could be bad."

"Cole has cancer."

* * *

Eli's Point of View

I made it home an hour after talking with Adam. I took a nap and a shower, made myself some dinner and sat down at my computer expecting to get some work on my new book done. But something else came out instead. The story of a little boy who ruled the world fell onto the screen and I missed a phone call. Two hours later after I churned out a good five chapters I saw the red blinking light on my answering machine. I had messages. I called in, dialing my password and hearing the desperation in Clare's voice, I left for her place in mere moments, without even calling to tell her I was on my way.

I drove to her place, worried that something happened to Cole, that something had happened to her.

Taking the stairs up, two at a time and banging furiously on the door I waited to see her, those five seconds in the hallway painfull.

Alli came to the door, tears streaking down her face and Clare staning behind her, face pale, eyes dull.

"Eli." She ran to me, her arms encompassing my body her face burried into my shoulder.

All I could think was something happened to Cole, but I was sure we wouldnt be hanging in her apartment if something severe had happened to him. I held her tight as I saw a muscled man holding a giggling Cole over his shoulder like a sack of potatos.

"Daddy!" Cole shreiked with glee, as the man just raised an eyebrow in our direction.

"looks like Mommy has company Little Man." Owen dropped Cole onto the couch roughly and I winced. The poor kid was diagnosed with cancer and the man acting as his father throws him around like a teenage girl at a pillow fight.

"Hey big guy." I spoke softly to the toddler, his mother still in my arms her body completely still. She wouldnt let go.

"Ewi!" He ran to me, wrapping his chubby arms around my leg and doing just as his mother did at the sight of me, took hold of my person, and not let go.

A/N: Hey, I know it has been awhile since I updated and I'm sorry for that. I have decided that there will be at least fourteen more chapters to this story, but there will also be a sequel, just as long, perhaps even longer than this story.

**Don't forget about the contest to give Cole a middle name. Can you guess who shows up in the next few chapters?** One shots act as a reward for the winner of the name contest and whoever guesses correctly.

I hope you guys liked what I had this time, please** Read and Review**! Your input makes me update faster.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey Guys, expect more updates this week, I'm hoping to be done with this story by the time August comes around.

But big news, I became an aunt on Tuesday! David Joshua is the cutest red faced newborn baby I've ever seen.

I went through all of your reviews, thank you so much. This chapter is dedicated to my first three reviewers of the last chapter. So, thank you to BeentherdonethT, DegrassiLover8910, and ILoveEclare3496, and to all my other reviewers, you make my day brighter. Remember, the first three to review will get the next chapter dedicated to them!

Now, onto the **contest winners**:

BeentherdonethT: Cole Gabriel Edwards

Livelovelaugh91: Cole Dylan Edwards

ChemicalPanic: Cole Brendan Edwards

I am personally leaning towards one, so, I know which name I am going to use, because it goes best with the story line, but I am going to continue the contest to see what you guys choose. There will be a few more contests in this story, so keep your eyes peeled. Remember,** the person who wins gets to dictate to me a prompt for my next one-shot**. Read my other stories to see what I can do.

Yes, everyone, Fitz is coming up, but not yet, there is one character in particular, mentioned in the show, but never seen before, who will make an appearance in the next chapter. Take another guess.

How we left off:

"_Looks like Mommy has company Little Man." Owen dropped Cole onto the couch roughly and I winced. The poor kid was diagnosed with cancer and the man acting as his father throws him around like a teenage girl at a pillow fight._

_"Hey big guy." I spoke softly to the toddler, his mother still in my arms her body completely still. She wouldn't let go._

_"Ewi!" He ran to me, wrapping his chubby arms around my leg and doing just as his mother did at the sight of me, took hold of my person, and not let go._

**Chapter 8**

Eli's Point of View

"Okay, what's going on here?"

Owen was the first one to speak up, his eyes flashing with concern as he watched his family hold tight to me. I just shrugged my shoulders at him. I didn't want to explain how I had found Clare, just in case he didn't know her secret profession.

"He showed up at the club, and I couldn't get rid of him." Clare mumbled into my shoulder, her voice muffled as she clutched to me.

I pushed her away slightly and she shifted so her face wasn't covered by my shirt.

"Now, I'm not so sure I want him to go." I smiled at her, Knowing that she wanted to be with me just as much as I wanted to be with her made my heart pull. I was getting my second chance.

I kissed her lips then, not exactly a soft peck, but nothing to passionate, I didn't want to scar Cole for life. He watched us with awe, his little face open to everything that was going on. He was completely aware, and completely happy.

"Why the Hell is my son so attached to you?" Owen bellowed as Cole reached up for me. He wanted me to carry him and so I did, letting the boy sit in my arms, his eyes sparkling as he picked at the cotton of my shirt.

"My Ewi" He wrapped his small arms around my neck and hung there.

I felt complete, with Clare at my side, and Cole in my arms. I felt like a real man.

"Put my kid down." I had no clue why Owen was so upset. I was Clare's boyfriend, or whatever. If Alli was allowed to be lovey with Cole, why couldn't I. "DUDE."

Alli was at his side, with a hand on his shoulder trying to calm him. Owen stepped towards me menacingly and I quickly slipped Cole into his mother's arms.

"Don't Dude me, I had your kid in my arms, why would you ever get so angry and violent with him around." I stepped in front of Clare, blocking the child from site.

"He's not some delicate little flower. He's my boy." I turned to look at Clare, raising my eyebrows at her. He didn't know that his kid was sick.

"He has cancer." Owen stopped, frozen, rigid as a look of pain and panic crossed his face.

"Clare?" She looked away pain flashing in her blue eyes. "Cole? Baby?"

"Hi Daddy." Clare stepped out from behind me, and Cole was as happy and oblivious as ever.

Owen let out a sob as he rushed towards his little family. He kissed Clare's forehead and cuddled Cole, who looked around unblinkingly and surprised.

Alli and I just stood there, a little uncomfortable as they whispered together. I was shocked to see Alli on the outside, I was sure that because of her friendship with Clare and her long relationship with Owen that she would have been more involved in her future step-child's life than she really was.

Clare was crying and Alli just accepted the fact that her best friend and her fiancé would always have this connection. I never thought I'd see the day when Alliah Bhandari would grow up.

* * *

Clare's Point of View

Owen and I discussed what was happening to Cole. We knew that no matter what we had to work together. I could tell he was jealous. Owen was already insecure with the fact that Cole wasn't his biological son; it made him more anxious to think that Eli would take over his role. I knew I had to reassure him about his role in mine and Cole's life, so we had a little chat, ignoring the others in the room as I told him that nobody could ever take his place in my heart, but with him and Alli together, that it was probably time for me to find someone else to rely on.

Eli coaxed Cole from my arms at some point during the discussion and had taken him to get a bath and put him into his pajamas. Alli was draped across the couch with a magazine in her hands. By the time we had finished talking Cole was ready for bed and Toy Story was playing on the television.

Alli hugged me goodbye and Owen placed a kiss on Cole's forehead before they left. I turned off the overhead lights and grabbed a throw out of my bedroom, grabbing Cole's Raffy before snuggling up beside Eli on the couch. Cole was sitting in Eli's lap, his eyes watching Buzz and Woody attentively on the television.

I felt calmed in Eli's arms, my son obviously safe beside me, I was sure no one could tell the type of tragedy that had struck.

I watched Cole lean back against Eli, and I knew that I wanted this moment to last forever.

* * *

Eli's Point of View

I woke up to my phone ringing and a stiff neck. I reached over, trying not to move too much, afraid I'd wake either Clare or Cole at any second. Clare shifted against my shoulder. I'm sure she isn't that comfortable. Cole on the other hand was sprawled across my lap, his head resting against Clare's cleavage.

"Hello?" I whispered into the phone, I could hear Adam somewhere on the other line.

"Why are you whispering?" Fiona asked loudly against my ear.

"Cole and Clare are sleeping." I watched them carefully, hoping I didn't wake them.

"You stayed with them?" I could hear the shock in her voice.

"What do you want Fi?" I was annoyed with her, calling at 8 in the morning expecting me to be awake.

"We were on our way over to your place to take you to breakfast, but, I guess we will have to go over to Clare's instead. We have big news."

I gave her Clare's address and slowly woke up the sleeping beauties.

I kissed Clare awake, our lips pressing against one another, our tongues slipping together. She moaned, and sat up trying to pull me against her before realizing that Cole was still lying across us. That cooled the fire. I knew I was going to get hard if I thought about her any longer, so I imagined my Bullfrog in a pink polka dot bikini. That did the trick, and together we woke up Cole, tickling (my part) and kissing (Clare's job) the three year old awake.

"Mommy." He cried out between infectious giggles. "Stop it." I blew a raspberry into his belly, making him laugh harder.

We stopped soon after that, the giggles and shrieks coming to a stop as we calmed down.

I smiled against Clare's lips as she kissed me.

"Adam and Fiona are on their way." She looked at me confused.

"Were going for breakfast." I lifted Cole up as I carried him to his bedroom, letting him bounce on the bed until Clare followed us in. She picked out his clothing for the day and asked me to help him get dressed as she took a quick shower.

"Why aw we leaving?" Cole asked his speech impediment strong at this hour in the morning.

"We are going to have breakfast with my friends and then head to the doctor."

"Doctow?" Cole looked terrified at going back to the hospital.

"Are you going to have pancakes or waffles?" That brightened him up immediately.

"PANCAKES!" he screeched. Clare ran into the room, a towel wrapped around her body, her hair soaking, water droplets slipping down her skin.

No matter what I did now, it was impossible to stop myself from getting hard.

"Cole?" She looked at her son, surprised to hear so much noise coming from him.

"Mommy! We can have pancakes!" He was so excited about the pancakes for breakfast that thankfully he didn't notice me eying his mother. Clare though, saw the look in my eye and excused herself, running off to put on a fresh change of clothes before seeing Adam again, after all these years.

**A/N: So, that is chapter 8, sorry it is so short. I hope you guys liked it.**

**Don't forget to vote on your favorite name:**

**Cole Gabriel Edwards**

**Cole Dylan Edwards**

**Cole Brendan Edwards**

**Congratulations to the top three, I was really excited to see all of the feedback that I received. Sadly, I couldn't choose every submission, so I chose the top three that sounded right.**

**Please remember to _Read and Review_!**


	9. Chapter 9

Hello there again, I had a fantastic weekend; I hope yours was as wonderful as mine. The results for the name contest are in, and I have to say, I'm very happy with your decisions.

To my three candidates, I** have decided to offer each of you a chance to prompt me my next three one shots**, so by the end of the summer I will have three more stories dedicated to BeentherdonethT, Livelovelaugh91, and ChemicalPanic. The name that will be used in this story is…..(**Drew, drum roll please**!)…..**Cole Gabriel Edwards**.

The results came back as follows:

Cole Gabriel Edwards with 5

Cole Dylan Edwards with 4

Cole Brendan Edwards with 2

So, BeentherdoneThT is our wonderful winner, the sequel will be dedicated to her for her amazing help, and she wins something else, but, that comes in the next story.

So without further ado, where we last left off:

_"PANCAKES!" he screeched. Clare ran into the room, a towel wrapped around her body, her hair soaking, water droplets slipping down her skin._

_No matter what I did now, it was impossible to stop myself from getting hard._

_"Cole?" She looked at her son, surprised to hear so much noise coming from him._

_"Mommy! We can have pancakes!" He was so excited about the pancakes for breakfast that thankfully he didn't notice me eying his mother. Clare though, saw the look in my eye and excused herself, running off to put on a fresh change of clothes before seeing Adam again, after all these years_.

Chapter 9

Clare's Point of View

"Clare Edwards" Fiona squealed when I opened the door to my apartment, and immediately I wanted to bang my head against the wall. Despite being good friends in high school, her optimistic outlook on life really didn't do much for me right now.

"Fiona, Adam, it's really nice to see you both again." Adam was hard to see, standing behind Fiona holding a very large giraffe stuffed animal. Cole, who came to investigate the noise hid shyly behind my leg as Fiona and Adam came into our home. Eli was leaning against the wall, smirking as he watched his friend struggle with the toy. When Adam put the long necked toy onto the ground and went to hug me Cole took his chance, pulling the new stuffed toy with him into his bedroom.

"Ewi" he called for Eli's help with the huge toy as he tried to shut the door to his bedroom.

Fiona and Adam watched as Eli chased after my son, calling out that he was going to tickle him as he burst through the bedroom door. Shrieks of laughter could be heard as the door shut, and I smiled softly, happy that Eli was behaving so fatherly with Cole.

"It's good to see you Clare." Adam hugged me, his arms crushing me against his upper body.

"It's wonderful to see you too Adam." I pushed him away slightly. "You really didn't have to get him anything."

He burst out laughing as Fiona gave me a hug as well.

"That's stupid Clare, he's your kid, and automatically, like my nephew. He deserves his own planet, but I just don't know how to buy one, so since Eli said giraffes are his favorite animal, we got him one."

"Thank you." My eyes were damp as I gave Adam another tight squeeze.

"Cole, time to go baby," my baby came running towards me, his arms outstretched. Eli followed on his heels, not needing to run as his longer stride kept him at my child's pace. Cole jumped into my arms and Eli came next, kissing my forehead and ruffling Cole's hair playfully.

"So, we ready to go?" Eli smiled widely as Fiona and Adam stared at him, jaws open, eyes wide.

"Eli?" Adam was the first to speak up.

"Hey, Adam, how's it going?" It was strange for them to see Eli so happy.

"Everything's going good." He continued to look at Eli strangely, "Are you ok?"

"Yep, I'm perfect, right Cole?"

"Yeppew Peppew" the little boy giggled at his rhyme, before he tucked his head into the crook of my neck.

"This is Cole," I announced to my friends. Adam gave him a fist bump and Fiona cooed over his cuteness. Eli just stood by, watching proudly.

Everything was just, so strange.

Eli's Point of View

We went out to a diner, just around the corner from Clare's. Adam and Fiona watched me closely as I interacted with Cole and Clare smiled as her son adopted me into his life. I felt like I had finally found my family, these people needed me, and all I wanted was to be with them.

I helped cut up Cole's pancakes as he ate, making sure everything was okay with him so Clare could spend some time getting caught up with Fiona and Adam.

While the adults talked Cole and I colored.

"Ewi, am I going to be okay?" Cole had climbed into my lap at some point and rested his head against my chest.

A pain shot through where my heart was.

"You're going to be fine buddy, I promise." He smiled faintly.

I could feel tears stinging at my eyes, I blinked them away hastily.

"I wuv you Ewi, tank you fow taking cawe of me and Mommy." He wrapped his arms around my neck and burried his little face into my skin.

"I love you too Cole."

I could tell there were eyes watching me as this scene occured.

Clare's Point of View

I never thought I'd see the day when Elijah Goldsworthy would interact so well with a child, but seeing him with my son, watching them color as I talked tto Adam and Fiona had me in awe of my child.

Cole was incredible.

I sat there getting to know my friends again, feeling as though nothing had changed since we were in high school, besides the little boy lisping in Eli's lap.

I was nervous for the doctors appointment, sitting in that office finding out what had to be done to get Cole better. The closer it was to that moment the more real his cancer seemed.

I didn't want to have to deal with this. You never expect that your child will get ill, that you would be one of THOSE parents, desperate for a cure, hair a mess, dark circles under your eyes, skeletal, because all you want iss for your child to get better.

Now that I knew this was happening to us, I had to make some improtant decisions regarding money. I tried to listen as Fiona and Adam spoke, but all I could hear were my own thoughts about hospital bills whirling through my mind. How could I ever pay for something like this? Adam and Fiona had it easy, the Coynes were wealthy, and paid for everything for the couple, I thought about asking them for help somewhere down the line, but I needed money now, to help pay for the last doctor's visit.

My mind wandered more, trying to find a solution to my imminent problem. I though about my options, what I had thought up when Cole first got sick. There was always extra shifts at work, which I already planned to do, but there was something else. The other women who work there pull some freelance work on the side, I never wanted to be like that. I swore to myself when I first started working that I would never have sex for money, but now that I was desperate, there was nothing else I could do.

I made some more small talk before sending a quick text to Coleen.

_Hey, you know your side job? Any extra costumers I could help you with. I need the money. I'll tell you all tonight. _

I took a deep breath.

I had signed my soul to the devil.

**A/N Please READ and REVIEW!**

I hope you guys enjoyed this, expect more tomorrow!


	10. Chapter 10

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, everyman knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

A/N: Wow, it's been quite some time, Happy Easter/Passover! I have an idea for another contest, also I'm taking requests for one shots, so if anyone has anything they have been itching to read and can't find, tell me and I will write it! Now onto the story!

Clare's Point of View

I waited for Coleen to come out of the bathroom, my hands were sweating and there was a huge knot in my stomach. I took a breath.

"Coleen?"

The door cracked open light poured into the dimly lit hallway.

"Hey sweetie,she looked around, checking to make sure noone was watching us and pulled me into the small room woith her.

"Sorry, this is the only place I could think of that we'd have privacy to talk about this." She sat down on the toilet seat and waited patiently for me to talk.

"Cole has cancer." My voice seemed dull to me, like it came from another person.

Coleen's eyes filled with tears and she grasped one of my hands. She gave me a watery smile as I just stood there, stoic.

"So you wan't some customers to pay for hospital bills?" she pressed.

I nodded.

She took out her phone and went through her contcts.

"Here's a guy, he likes them young, I had an appointment with him tonight, taking over for Sophie, but he'd likely want you over me."She looked at me seriously. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

I nodded again. I had to do this.

She gave me the address told me I had to meet him at 8.

"He's going to make you dinner, he likes to think of this as more of a date then him just paying for sex. So dress up nicely."

I grinned.

"it's been a while since I've been on any kind of date without Cole."

"Just be yourself."

I went home nervous for my date, Cole was out with Eli and I had the apartment to myself, so I took a bubble bath.

Eli's Point of View

Cole was sticky with cotton candy while we walked through the zoo. His jacket was zipped all the way up and his blue eyes shined with excitement as I pushed his stroller.

"Ewi" He looked up at me his curls bouncing as we walked, "Wheyre's the 'raffes?

All he wanted was to see the Giraffes and thats where we were going. We rounded the corner and I laughed at the squeal of delight he let out at seeing the long necked creatures.

"Goldsworthy."

I turned at the voice, I would recognize it anywhere.

"Fitz." I glowered at him as he walked towards us.

"Cute kid, he yours?" I shook my head.

"My uh...friend's." He bent down to Cole's level. And examined him closely.

"Looks kinda like Edwards." He said more to himself then me, and shrugged his shoulders. All I could think about is what I wanted to do to the guy. He hurt Clare, and should be in jail for the rest of his life for it.

"Look man, it was nice seeing you" I looked at him confused. "I'd like to catch up sometime, and appologize for all of the shi-stuff I did to you."

I nodded and took the paper with his adress and phone number that he offered me. And he walked away. I crumpled it up in a ball and dropped it in the nearest trash can.

"Who was dat?" Cole asked.

"Just someone Mommy and I knew when we were in school" I shook off the feeling that someone was watching me and smiled down at Cole.

"Let's try to feed the Giraffes."

Clare's Point of View

I knocked on the apartment door. 2D. The doorway to the Devil's lair. I could hear clothing russtling and voices behind the door.

"You have to leave, she's here" One voice whispered.

"You couldn't do this some other time, it just had to be the day I got out?"

"Mark, leave."

The door sprang open, and thats when I saw him.

"Fitz?"

"Clare Edwards?" He barked out a laugh. "You're a hooker now?"

A/N I know it's short, but this was necessary in order for me to get back in the swing of things. I promise I will finish this story, it might take time but I need to tell it all. Sorry for the cliffy.

Please read and review, I love your feedback, it helps me grow as a writer.


	11. Chapter 11

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, everyman knows her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

A/N: Wow, it's been quite some time, I'm taking requests for one shots, so if anyone has anything they have been itching to read and can't find, tell me and I will write it! Now onto the story!

_"Mark, leave."_

_The door sprang open, and thats when I saw him._

_"Fitz?"_

_"Clare Edwards?" He barked out a laugh. "You're a hooker now?"_

Clare's Point of View

"I...I-uh" I couldn't say a word, all I could do was stammer and stare.

"You must be Clare," A handsome man with a long scar running down the side of his face came to the doorway. "Mark was just leaving."

"It's nice to meet you." The man stuck out his hand, and Clare looked from the hand back to his face blankly for a moment.

"Jack," he smiled. "Jack Fitzgerald."

"Saint Clare, meet my brother. This is the reason I edned up in prison, Jacky Boy, this gorgeous girl whose now giving it away for free." Fitz spat the words out hatefully.

"Mark, I want you gone." Jack was fed up with his brother. "I'm sorry about him, Clare, come in, please."

I felt like I was in a movie. _Beauty and the Beast_ or _Pretty Woman_, or a mixture of both. His apartment was beautifully decorated. It was black and white with blocks of bold color poping out at me, nothing like the place I called home. I wanted to think about Jack, to be interested. The food smelled amazing, the table tastefully decorated with candles and wine, but all I could think about was Eli.

_Eli, who was amazing with my son. Sweet and kind. Sarcastic, funny, intelligent, Eli. The man I had so much history with. The man I still had feelings for. The man I always loved._

Eli's Point of View

It was late when Cole and I got back. we had already grabbed a bite to eat and I was sure that Clare would be home, it was her day off and she hadn't mentioned having much of a social life when we talked. Actually it sounded like everything was either Cole or work. she needed time to herself, and I was happy to be the one to give it to her.

"Clare?" I called her name and waited for her sweet reply, Cole's head was rested against my chest and I pushed the empty stroller into the apartment and dropped the bag with his toys and necessities onto the couch.

"Honey, I'm home!" I hoped for a giggle, or something. Maybe she was taking a nap, or she went out for groceries. I checked the fridge as Cole rubbed his tired eyes and yawned against me.

"Should we take a bath?" I asked him slowly, his nodding the only answers I would recieve for the rest of the evening.

I placed himm down on the couch with Raffe and went to draw the bath. Moments later I rreturned to find him asleep with a thumb in his mouth and his bottom in the air. I lifted him to my chest again and by passed the bathroom entirely to make my way to his bedroom. I changed him into his pajamas and slipped him under the covers with the giraffe before turning on the night light smoothing down his curls and kissing him on the forehead.

"Goodnight Cole" I whispered to him. "I love you."

A/N: This is very short, I know but I expect more to be written this morning and posted hopefully on Moday, I just thought that Eli telling Cole he loved him was a great wa to end this chapter.


	12. Chapter 12

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, everyman her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

A/N: Wow, it's been quite some time, I'm taking requests for one shots, so if anyone has anything they have been itching to read and can't find, tell me and I will write it! Now onto the story!

_I placed him down on the couch with Raffe and went to draw the bath. Moments later I returned to find him asleep with a thumb in his mouth and his bottom in the air. I lifted him to my chest again and by passed the bathroom entirely to make my way to his bedroom. I changed him into his pajamas and slipped him under the covers with the giraffe before turning on the night-light smoothing down his curls and kissing him on the forehead._

_"Goodnight Cole" I whispered to him. "I love you."_

Clare's Point of View

We had been talking for an hour, non-stop, eating a delicious meal, drinking a nice fruity wine and having stimulating conversation. Jack had told me about his accident and I had let it slip about Cole. I knew it wouldn't take too long before he put two and two together and realized that Fitz-I mean Mark was his father and he was his uncle.

"Can I see a picture of him?"

Jack was a bit forward about his interest in my son.

"Um-sure." I took out my phone and passed it to him. "That's Cole, with 'Raffe and Eli at the Zoo today, Eli texted it to me before I came over."

"Is Eli your boyfriend?"

"I-uh-I don't know-I guess you could call him that."

"Is he ok with this situation?"

"Well, he doesn't know, it's my decision anyway-I'm an adult."

"Clare-"

"Jack, look you're a great guy, and you already know I'm not going to sleep with you. You've known since your brother mentioned my name. But I will let you in on a secret." I paused.

"I already know Clare, I saw it as soon as I looked into his face."

"You know that Cole is your nephew?"

"I know that your son is also my brother's child."

* * *

Eli's Point of View

I had never felt such an all consuming feeling in my life for someone other than my parents. This was a different kind of love than I felt for Julia or Clare, this was unconditional and romantic. Familial. I wanted to take him in my arms and rock him to sleep, to take away his pain. but that would never happen. Clare didn't see me as anything more than her friend Eli anymore.

I needed to show her my feelings for her had never changed. I needed to show her that I want to take care of her forever, just her and Cole and I, and whatever children were to come.

I was tired of pretending. I needed her to be mine again.

* * *

Clare's Point of View

I was shocked, he knew. He knew and he didn't want to kill me or kick me out. He was calm and collected.

"I wan't to be in his life, just like Mark and the rest of my family has the right to be there for him."

"I don't think thats a good ide-"

"Clare, he needs a chance to know his father."

"He already has plenty of father figures, ones who didn't rape me."

"Please, Clare."

I was angry.

"He has cancer."

"Now, we better get the chance to see him or I'll take you to court."

My eyes were wide with fright. I stood to leave.

"Here." He handed me an envelope, and dug into his back pocket for his wallet, and handed me a wad of cash.

"This is for you, and this is for Cole."

* * *

Eli's Point of View

It was after midnight when I was awoken by screaming, I ran to Coles room to find him tossing and turning and slowly crawled in beside him wrapping my arms around him soothing his screaming and whimpering form.

My poor baby boy.

* * *

Clare's Point of View

$20,000 for Cole. $20,000.

I couldn't do it, couldn't go through with it. It was time to make better decisions and sake someone who had real money.

Fiona Coyne.


	13. Chapter 13

Clare Edwards isn't daddy's little girl anymore. As a stripper at Toronto's hottest strip club, Exit 69, everyman her name, except the one man she has been hiding from for the past four years. When Elijah Goldsworthy walks into the club one cool March night it takes everything Clare has not to run the moment she sees him, instead she gets up on that stage and bares all to the man that left her behind.

* * *

A/N: I am hoping for an adorable image for this story, preferably of Eli, Clare and Cole, so the next contest has officially begun and involves photoshoping together an image for this story; use your imagination and have fun.

* * *

**previously seen:**

_$20,000 for Cole. $20,000._

_I couldn't do it, couldn't go through with it. It was time to make better decisions and ask someone who had real money._

_Fiona Coyne._

* * *

Clare's Point of View

It was late when I came home. Later than I expected. I had money in my pocket ana check in my wallet and for the first time since Cole had been diagnosed I was at ease. Or at least as at ease as any mother could be in this situation.

Fiona and Adam had been very accommodating, inviting me in for a late night drink and listening to all of my thoughts before making any rash decisions.

They of course immediately said yes to any help I asked for, monetarily or emotionally, though I think they realize that Eli fills that vast emotional void that used to be called my heart. Adam had offered their babysitting services, hinting at possible future dates with Eli and making me blush profusely.

I hadn't been inside the door to my apartment for more than a moment before noticing that Eli wasn't on the couch.

I could hear snores coming from Cole's bedroom and knew where my two boy's were.

I slipped into my nightgown and crept slowly into the room and watched my shaddow dance accross their faces, my son was curled against Eli's side, his face pressed against his chest.

* * *

Eli's Point of View

I fell asleep as soon as Cole stopped wailing beside me, and dreamt of Clare. Sexy Clare, cute Clare, beautiful Clare, sleepy Clare...flashes of every moment I had ever spent with her filled my my mind. I woke to a slight breeze, a curvacious shaddow and the soft hum of Clare's siging voice.

She was dressed in a dark green silky nightdress that fell to mid-thigh and was watching me with sparkling blue eyes.

"Hey," She whispered, smiling softly, her hair curling delicately around her face. "You wanna talk?"

"Yeah," I nodded, my voice thick with sleep.

I removed Cole from my chest as gently as possible, placing his little arms around Raffe's long neck. I followed Clare down the hall into her bedroom.

"Sound doesn't carry into his room from here." I nodded my head, she sat down on her bed. Looked up at me with her large eyes and said something that nearly killed me.

"I almost had sex for money tonight."

My mouth fell open immediately, I was in shock, my beautiful Clare was prostituting herself.

* * *

Clare's Point of View

He sat down beside me on the bed and took my hands in his.

"Clare, you know I have some money, I care so much about you and Cole, please let me help."

I smiled softly.

"There's nothing to worry about. I decided against it. I went to Adam and Fiona instead, and they are helping me out."

He pulled me into a tight hug and laughed against my neck. I could feel my hair move with each breath he took. I turned in his arms, causing him to lean away and look down at me.

"Eli," my eyes moved across his face from his eyes to his lips, flickering back and forth between the two."I'm so-"

His lips pressed against mine urgently, and I knew I was falling for Eli, head-over-heels, butterflies-in-my-stomach, heart-on-my-sleeve, all over again.

A/N: Short but necessary.

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